Blog entry 8 – After-Erasmus Depression
Yes, it really does exist: After-Erasmus depression. It also caught me. I’m sitting on my bed surrounded by three half unpacked suitcases for 3 days now. Somehow I can't move, I can't clean up anything, I don't want to get out. The latter could also be simply due to the fact that it rains continuously and the temperature is about 16 degrees. In Bologna it was 36 degrees on the day of my departure. Welcome to Germany! Not only the German weather is troubling me, but also the unbearable silence here in my home village. If I now walk out the door, after a ten minute walk, I don’t find myself in the beautiful old town of Bologna, but in the next cornfield. Well, thank you! I already miss the Italian chatter around me, the smell of pizza in the streets, the long summer nights and generally I miss my relaxed Erasmus life with all the trimmings.
The last two weeks in Bologna have been really nice. One last time I drove to Ancona to the sea to get a taste of the sea air before I have to go back to my everyday life in Germany. Saying goodbye to my friends and to the city before I got on the Flixbus to Karlsruhe in the evening was very sad, especially because I know that some of the people, who I have become very fond of during the semester abroad, I probably won’t see again before next year. But the Erasmus semester has come to an end and I have to come to terms with that.
After 13.5 hours of an exhausting bus ride through what felt like half of Europe, I was jolly glad to arrive at the train station in the morning and finally be able to embrace my family and friends at home. Although saying goodbye to Bologna was sad, the reunion with my loved ones was awesome.
Of course it's great to see friends and family again after some time, but somehow everyone here is stuck in their everyday life as usual and I have to find my way back to my everyday life. Although the environment, people and language were familiar after about ten seconds after my arrival, I still need a little more time to feel comfortable again. For me, completing Erasmus is not only the end of a six-month stay in Italy, but also the end of my studies. I now have to get used to the idea that in about two months the right working life will begin and that I will have to leave the time in Würzburg behind me. From the relaxed “Erasmus bubble”, in which I had very little responsibility, I now slide into the stressful everyday life and I have to cope with that.
But when I look at the pictures from Italy for the twentieth time in these three gloomy days and see the happy faces smiling at me, I know that it was definitely the right decision to study in Bologna for half a year and I would do it again and again. However, there is one positive thing about returning to Germany: I can finally cross the zebra crossing again and the cars will really stop immediately!